I had a post all ready to go tonight but it has taken a back seat for now because one of my best friends lost her Dad this morning and I have no idea how to make it all better.
Dear Friend,
You and I have only been friends a reasonably short time but we have shared so much, have loads in common and become quite close, It feels like we’ve known each other for years.
And I hate the fact that we now have another thing in common.
I hate that there are no words. No words that I could speak that would lessen the pain. There is nothing I could do that would ease the ache in your heart and I want to take away the fog that has probably started to descend on you right now. I hate that fog. It’s overwhelming, all-consuming and like a tonne of bricks has been heaped onto your shoulders.
I pray for the enveloping peace of God to cover you and your family now. That you would allow Him to take that burden from you.
There is so much to organise, to plan and to deal with and friend, I want you to know that I am here. I am here when you want to scream, when you want to cry or even if you just want to sit in silence.
I am still here even if you want to shut down and hibernate for a while: But please know that doesn’t mean I will stop checking on you. I will watch you closely but only because I care.
I promise not to be one of those friends that says “Call me if you need anything” as a flippant throw away line with good intentions, because let’s face it: You won’t call. No one ever does. We all hate to have to ask for help. It’s how we are. Instead, I will bless you un-expectantly because you deserve to be looked after.
I also promise not to avoid you like so many people do out of fear of causing offence. To steal a line from another close friend: I come with an apology: I may not always say the right things, I probably won’t always have the right words and I often put my foot in my mouth but I won’t carry on as though there in an elephant in the room that nobody wants to mention.
And in the words of one of my favourite songwriters Neil Finn in Distant Sun:
I don’t pretend to know what you want
But I offer love…..
Love Me x
I am so sorry for your friends great loss! I hope that in time she will feel at peace and her memories of her dad will sustain her until they meet again.
Lovely letter to your friend, keeping you both in my prayers.
Love you loads my lovely Fi. Lees. xxxx {{{{HUG}}}} X
Prayers for your friend’s comfort.
Your friend is blessed to be friends to people like you in such a time of need. You will know the right thing to do, at the right time, without your friend asking, and it will embarrass them, but the days following they will be so touched that you did it.
My thoughts are with your friend and their family.
I felt like I needed this letter sent to me. The elephant in the room, the pink elephant that is, is actually blue all of 5′ 9″ fat and muscles all in one, who looks so odd, and unsociable, but only because he feels unwanted, is hurting inside, and affects him in a different more sordid way.
I know how it feels, and I guess there are a lot of things that we parents have to accept. We cant expect from other people, even those close to you. I just know how to feel or act or look when faced with a special person in our midst. One doesnt avoid the blue elephant, yes one canignore the vocal tics, and/or rude outbursts if one has to, but never never ignore the person. Never think that it is his fault that he is such.
Sorry if I veered from the topic. hahaha. There is nothing more devastating than losing someone you love. And yes, one cant pretend to know what one wants or feels. We just have to offer love.