So there has been a lot going on behind the scenes here lately. I’m not ready to share any of it publicly but I wanted to blog a beautiful inspiring email that I was sent by two different friends last week that really encouraged me.
A lot of you may have read it before, but it is so good and applicable to parents of special needs kids that I’m going to share it here again for those that may not have seen it…
A young lady confidently walked around the room while leading and explaining stress management to an audience with a raised glass of water. Everyone knew she was going to ask the ultimate question, ‘half empty or half full?’… She fooled them all … “How heavy is this glass of water?” she inquired with a smile.
Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. to 20 oz.
She replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, that’s not a problem.
If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you’ll have to call an ambulance.
In each case it’s the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.” She continued,“And that’s the way it is with stress. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won’t be able to carry on.”
“As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again. When we’re refreshed, we can carry on with the burden – holding stress longer and better each time practiced.
So, as early in the evening as you can, put all your burdens down.
Don’t carry them through the evening and into the night… Pick them up tomorrow.
So for now, I’m placing my glass of water down for a rest to get refreshed and to ease my load. It’s gotten far too heavy to hold for extended periods and I need God’s strength more than ever.
I hope all of you realise what a wonderful and sometimes thankless job you are doing and that you are not alone.
Fi x
Love you my precious friend, praying for you and yours.
Great story, and glad you are placing down the glass. Try to get some rest.
Thinking of you, praying for you.
Love you to the moon and back.
Lees. xxxx {{{{HUG}}}} X
Perfect.
Thinking of you often every day and sending great big love.
“you are not alone”
xoxo
Hugs my friend.
Cool analogy!
Yes, we are not alone, I am blessed to have met you through this site. Hope to meet others too.
Lets not keep our glasses up except when we toast – which should be often! Cheers!
Brian King (a social worker who is on the autistic spectrum and helps parents and autistics learn better ways of living) has a similar story about holding something a long time that explains what it’s like to be autistic. Here’s an excerpt from his excellent essay:
If you have a Spectrumite routinely tuning out in class, it is because the mental effort required to connect is too much. Spacing out is a way of letting go of a connection that is too hard to maintain. Think of it as trying to hold on to a weight, so heavy that your hands keep getting tired, until you finally have to let go. Only when your hands are rested can you pick it back up. No amount of saying, “Pick it up” or “Stay on task” will change that fact.
Now, imagine that you are being asked to hold something heavy on each finger – that is the experience of multitasking. That is whatʼs required when listening, making eye contact and watching body language at the same time. Asking this of Spectrumites is psychological torture and socially selfish of anyone who requires it as a condition for being in a relationship with one of us.
As a Spectrumite, imagine how much more quickly you will get tired because you must put forth the mental effort to not simply connect, but to connect in multiple ways, then maintain those connections. I would say that meltdowns, especially in public places are, in part the result of intense brain fry. Add to this being tired or sick, and youʼll have even less strength to make connections.
from http://spectrummentor.com/profiles/blogs/the-strength-to-connect
Thanks for the link Sparrow,
I just found a post on Brian’s blog that has really helped me.
Love and hugs. xx
What a great analogy.
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I love this analogy! And I’m glad you’re putting your glass down to recharge.
Thank you for sharing this, what a wonderful analogy and oh so true! I am new to your blog and I am LOVING it. I have put it on my blogroll on my own blog. I have an 8 yo daughter with PDD NOS and I frequently blog about her and other topics at http://danalesramblings.blogspot.com.
Keep writing and I will keep reading.
Oh friends, I’m sorry that I haven’t responded to you all personally. I’m SO far behind in my comment answering, please forgive me and accept this as a promise to try to stay on top of them from now on! Thank you all for taking the time to comment though. I really appreciate it x
Fi