One of the BEST things that has happened to me since my boys diagnoses and since I have been blogging is : meeting adults on the spectrum.
They have given me such wonderful insight into my boys worlds and how differently they see things.
I have met some really awesome parents too and I get so many useful and helpful tips from other parents and they offer heartfelt compassion and more cyber hugs then I know what to do with!
Blogging has been such an amazing release for me, it’s helped me to get my head together and make more sense of what’s going on in there!
By putting my thoughts, fears and emotions down in writing, things seem to have less of a grip on me and I’m definitely a lot less frightened of the unknown now.
In the past few years, I have been caught in somewhat of a frantic thought process, trying desperately to make sense of autism and how it affects my boys differently and feeling at a total loss as to where to start and how to prioritise.
I’m trying really really hard to understand them both and why they do and say the things that they do but I lack the necessary inside knowledge to fully comprehend where to start and how to tackle some of their issues.
This is where these amazing adults on the spectrum have stepped up and helped me in an amazing way.
I have been helped both directly through regular emails from a few of my new close friends and also indirectly by reading many blogs written entirely by spectrummy adults.
Like with my latest corker from Harley!……
He often chats to himself and told me today that he doesn’t always know which voice in his head to listen to!
I admit that I freaked out a little bit at this and all the things I’d read about how in years gone by, before AS was discovered, that children were often misdiagnosed with childhood schitzophrenia immediately came to mind!
So I jumped onto the computer and emailed my close friend (who is an adult aspie) and asked her if this was normal in the world of aspergers…..her answer…..”Well, I was just talking to you in my head at the time that I opened this email …does that answer your question?”
I also went onto Wrong Planet and searched through their archives to see what I could find and it was brilliant.
I found entries saying things like….
” When I am alone I constantly have “practice” conversations with imaginary people or someone I actually know”
“People often tell me that I look distracted when they are talking to me…..this is because I’m either thinking about my special interest subject or talking to myself and practicing a script in my head so I know what to say next. “
And instantly I felt like I understood my boy much better!
Another thing that my friend has told me about is the “thought loop” that constantly plays in her head. She has also said that there are often several loops circling at once.
I asked Harley and Ella about this and they both nodded with delight to have me finally able to “describe” what goes on daily in their heads.
Ella said that she can focus by either reading, drawing or playing her guitar (I think these are all right brained functions though I’m not really knowledgeable on this) and Harley said that these “loops” drive him NUTS!
My understanding of the brain fuctions and which side we use is that:
Left = analytical side and
So it makes sense that doing these right brained activites switches off the analytical crazy thought loops for a bit.
I’ve found all of this absolutely fascinating and I’m now on the search for information about brain functions and how they affect autism.
If you get presented with the opportunity to become friends with an adult on the spectrum…..embrace them with all your hearts. The marvelous ones that I am friends with are amazingly gifted warm, and so so super smart !
But PLEASE don’t seek one out just to pick their brains and then confuse them with your false friendship just for your own selfish gain….that is wrong on so many levels…
I love my aspie friends simply because they are wonderful friends and great people…..